Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Invoking the Muse: This Status on “Fire”

Author’s Note: This piece was not originally intended to be published as an official post, but rather as a quick social media status update for #AmWriting, as I was working on an entirely separate hand-written draft of something moments before. As I started composing my tweet, I found myself wandering further and further into it to see where it led. I gave myself complete permission to write absolute garbage if that’s what it would take to get me out of my own damn way and finish something. Just a heads up. 

Time to Write

“Fire” is a great viewing choice to throw on the ol’ TV for background accompaniment while I’m whipping out a draft of my next blog post. Don’t you agree? Sure you do.Fire, Fandom, Self-Care,


Fun Facts:

“Fire” first aired 12/17/1993.

I was nearly 12-years-old when the “X-files” episode titled “Fire” first aired, and I had not yet become the asshat teenager who was “too cool” for family time. In fact, I could hardly wait for Friday night to roll around, the night my Dad and I planted ourselves in front of the TV for our briefings over the cases our favorite “Fibbies” were cracking that week.

“Fire” was re-aired on 9/07/18.

As a part of a BBCA X-Files marathon, it was the ONLY episode I found when scanning through the digital guide that listed the episode title on the main guide screen. To view other episodes’ titles, I actually had to delve further into the menu options.

BBCA knows what’s up. We’re all looking for the Sheppard ep. Awww, yeah. ??

“Fire” is the only X-Files episode on my DVR.

DVR real estate is precious in our household. “Bubble Guppies” reigns supreme, my dudes, all 71 episodes that are on there thus far. When I learned that “Fire” was rolling around in the rotation again, though, you bet your sweet a** that I cleared out some space to record a pyrokinetic baby-faced Mark Sheppard!

“Fire” has been my favorite X-files episode since I was a kid, and it’s probably the first piece in which I peeped Sheppard’s acting. *Nods* Good stuff. That final scene — if you don’t know what I’m talking about, you need to go watch it — it stuck with me. It rates right up there on my Freaks Me the F*** Out list, right alongside Tom Wright’s hitchhiker in “Creepshow 2.” They’re delightfully disturbing characters, and I can’t think about one without thinking about the other. That’s just how my silly little brain rolls.

“Fire” and Fandom are easy escapes.

You might’ve picked up on the fact that this piece kind of got away from me. What was supposed to be just a quick little status update mutated into a full-on post. Whoops. *shrugs* I do get to rambling on and on about my fanstuff. I can write endlessly and easily (though maybe not so prettily) about the actors, stories, and other various things that make me geek out. It’s way more fun to meander through my mind when the journey’s about exploring other people’s stories. It’s also more comfortable.

And that’s kind of the point …

I consider BubblesAndChaos.com to be a special needs parenting lifestyle blog, but you won’t see me writing exclusively in that niche, at least not in the traditional sense of how I’ve seen my peers going at it. Over time I’ll explain more about the what and why behind my decision and direction, but for now we’ll leave it at the idea that being a special needs parent can be a bit … intense … and … R-E-A-L.

Fandom, stories, and geeking out about sh** I think is cool, these things are essential to my survival.

They are as much a part of my lifestyle as being a special needs mom is.

Fandom, for me, is a form of self-care. Fandom gives me the space I need to momentarily drop my mental baggage at the door and stretch my brain a little. It gives me a chance to regroup momentarily. When I step back into my day-to-day life, I’m refreshed and ready to tackle the latest and greatest pulse-pounding WTFery Mr. Universe has chucked our way.
 Ain’t nobody got time to talk mama down off of the ledge. It is too busy around the House of Bubbles and Chaos for that nonsense. And so, staying at the top of my game as a parent and as a person is an absolute must.

Stories are a huge part of that for me. Reading, writing, watching TV shows and movies — these are the comfort foods that soothe my little soul. I binge as much as I can.

But Balance is important.

You’ve heard it before:

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.

Conversely, though:

All play and no work makes Jack a damn jerk.

And, boy, have I been a big one. I’ve been riding the fandom dragon high for weeks! What little content I’ve posted on-site has been absolutely fan-ish. Not to mention that I’ve been super-social fangirling hard on Twitter. In my defense, things did get R-E-A-L shortly after I returned from Denver Comic Con back in June.

We’ve been back and forth to the children’s hospital for K several times in the last couple of months on account of recently diagnosed seizure activity. Then there was The Teen’s medical drama. She went out of town for her first vacation sans parental supervision. Fun, huh? Or at least it was until she dislocated her jaw during a yawn (that’s totally a thing, guys; I know it sounds a bit suspect, but it turns out she has TMJ.

It’s been heavy and so a little extra play built into the day has not been a bad idea. I’ve connected with some wonderful people who I am proud to call my friends and I’m so grateful to have them in my life. I’m confident that as I step forward into this new phase of Real Life Scary Sh** for my family that my people will be there for me when I need them.

But now it’s time to balance the books. Off I go to the work of sorting through my emotional clutter and sharing my feels — not particularly because I want to, but because I need to. And just maybe I’ll manage to help a few people along the way. I hope so.

In the coming weeks, I’ll be settling back into my writing groove. Please bear with me. Form and structure are going to be clunky, at least at first (*sheepishly eyeballs the preceding paragraphs), and the accompanying graphics might be trash for a bit while I’m narrowing my focus on retraining my writing brain and developing my “in my feels” voice.

I’m pretty damn nervous about what’s to come, but when Mr. Universe says it’s time you don’t really have much of a choice.

Wish me luck.

No, wish me sushi. I’m hungry and luck is for suckers.

~Spot

Stace Freeze
Stace Freezehttps://bubblesandchaos.com
Mother, Wife, Poly-Fandemic (Thank you, Hansi, for introducing me to this fabulous term) Experimental Co-Creator of Worlds and Experiences, Cardslinger.

1 COMMENT

  1. Hell yeah, Spot! It’s about time to see this train leaving the station! Keep it real and keep it coming.

    Love, love, love you, you, you!!

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